Nice Guys and the White Knight Syndrome
Unfortunately too many nice guys can relate to this picture demonstrating the White Knight syndrome. For those who don’t know what the White Knight syndrome is, it is a disparaging term used to describe nice guys who try to protect a woman from having sex with a jerk. The way it usually works is like this, a nice guy sees a woman who is sexually attracted to a jerk and he proceeds to try to stop that from happening. This is not necessarily to hate on the jerk, it is primarily to protect her from making a mistake. His motivation is more about concern for the woman, than it is about hating.
There are many tactics that many different nice guys use to try to protect the woman, the most common nice guys use is to treat her like an adult be direct and tell her some variation of” hey I think getting with this guy is a mistake that you will regret”. And after you tell her that then what does she end up doing even if she agrees with you, she ends up having sex with the jerk. The question is why?
This phenomenon seems to happen so many times with so many different women? Common sense would dictate that If she was going to have sex or get with a guy, then why not the guy who’s looking out for her best interest and is proving it to her by trying to keep her from making a mistake? Because most nice guys are confused by her actions, they will be extremely tempted to see her still trying to get with the jerk as proof that women want jerks over nice guys, and this is not necessarily the case. What many nice guys do not see it a crucial mistake they are making when it comes to these situations.
The first thing nice guys don’t understand is that just because you tell somebody that’s something that’s bad for them does not necessarily stop them from wanting it especially if they do not have another option. If a woman is aroused buy the jerk and you tell her not to get with the jerk because he is bad for her that information will do little to diminish her desire. She may know that he is bad for her but she is still turned on and wants to do something with that energy.
Think of it like this if you are working at restaurant and you see a sandwich sitting out on the table for 24 hours and then you were to see somebody come up and start to eat that sandwich, you would tell them, “stop, that sandwich is bad for you”. Now if that person was hungry enough then that person would still eat that sandwich as soon as you turned your back even if they agreed with you that the sandwich is not the best thing for them.
The question is how do you stop that guy from eating something bad for him? The best thing you can do for that person who was hungry is to give them something else to eat, something better. It is the same with being a nice guy interacting with a woman who is dealing with a jerk.
Most nice guys do not make their intentions clear by that I mean most nice guys do not make it clear to woman that he is also an option. That is why a lot of the times when you finally break down and tell a woman how you feel she says I had no idea many times they do not. So understand that if you do not give a woman another option then she will usually pick the only option that she has the jerk. Never forget women only have sex with jerks because they can’t have sex with nice guys. Give them a better choice and trust them.